The slide rule song
Tom Lehrer
Introductory Dialog, spoken by the Professor:
Now to get on with the class --
I give you now the Section Man,
This friend of yours and mine'll
Offer you some very good advice about the final.
Section Man:
Be sure to bring your slide rules,
Don't forget them if you're sensible.
For if you use them wisely,
You'll find them indispensible.
The Slide Rule Song
Don't bring the answers in on bits of paper,
And don't be crude and write them on your cuff:
The proctors would catch on to such a caper,
And you can bet they'd get you soon enough.
Yes, the proctors would catch on to such a caper
And you can bet they'd get you soon enough.
Don't write them on your thumbnail -- that's the worst place,
Don't write them in the lining of your hat:
You really shouldn't be here in the first place,
If you can't be more original than that.
No, you really shouldn't be here in the first place
If you can't be more original than that.
Against such things they have a justified rule,
They'd expel you without benefit of doubt.
But if you hide the answers in your slide rule,
It's eight-to-five that no one will find out.
Yes, if you hide the answers in your slide rule,
It's eight-to-five that no one will find out.