Special High-Intensity Teaching

Memo to all students:

In order to assure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from students, it will be our policy to keep all students well taught through our program of Special High Intensity Teaching (SHIT). We are trying to give our students more SHIT than anyone else.

If you feel that you do not receive your share of SHIT on the course, please see your lecturer. You will be immediately placed at the top of the SHIT list, and our lecturers are especially skilled at seeing that you get all the SHIT you can handle.

Students who don't take their SHIT will be placed in Departmental Educational Evaluation Programs (DEEP SHIT). Those who fail to take DEEP SHIT seriously will have to go to Educational Attitude Training (EAT SHIT). Since our lecturers took SHIT before they graduated, they don't have to do SHIT anymore, and are all full of SHIT already.

If you are full of SHIT, you may be interested in a job teaching others. We can add your name to our Basic Understanding Lecture List (BULL SHIT).

For students who are intending to pursue a career in management and consultancy, we will refer you to the department of Managerial Operational Research Education (MORE SHIT). This course emphasizes on how to manage MORE SHIT.

If you have further questions, please direct them to our Head of Teaching, Special High-Intensity Teaching (HOT SHIT).

Thank you,

Boss In General,
Special High-Intensity Teaching